Will
I Recover?
"YES.
The answer is yes. Of all of the women who have stayed at
Interval House 75% have made real, measurable progress in
returning to health and well being." Success
Stories
We
suspect if males seek councelling and support they may recover
to the same degree.
The
Victim's Stages of Recovery - Recovery from codependent
victimhood usually occurs in a series of often overlapping
stages. Here is a rough outline of what you may expect,
though each individual is different.
Depression
and Lowered Self-Esteem
Abuse takes it toll on a body emotionally as well as physically.
Over time an abuse victim becomes heavily depressed, often
times to the point of considering suicide. The victim also
develops such a low level of self esteem, as to gain and
lose weight and change their physical appearance on a frequent
basis. This is another very serious characteristic, and
if suspected, should receive immediate attention.
Post
Traumatic Stress Disorder
Some people with PTSD repeatedly relive the trauma in the
form of nightmares and disturbing recollections during the
day. Seeing things that are a reminder of the incident may
be very distressing, which could lead to avoidance of certain
places or situations that bring back those memories.
The
emotions of the abuse survivor:
Guilt:
Very often, survivors will recall particular situations
and make statements like "I should have known…."
Or "If only I hadn't…." Sometimes, it is
easier to blame their own behavior, then to admit that their
abuser was truly to blame.
Shock
and Disbelief:
Sometimes, the survivor will have an incredibly hard time
facing the fact that the abuse has taken place. Often, the
survivor will make excuses for their abusers behavior.
Lack
of Control:
During the attack, the victim was entirely without control.
This fear of helplessness may extend into other aspects
of their lives, for varying amounts of time.
Fear:
Fear is the biggest tool used by an abuser to receive and
maintain control. This fear is not only of bodily injury
but of death as well. Many survivors say that the reason
they didn't fight back, or did not receive help right away
because they were fearful that their abuser would injure
or even kill them
Humiliation:
The survivor may feel dirty and ashamed, especially in cases
where sexual abuse has taken place. Many things that took
place during the abuse can be hard, or embarrassing to talk
about.
Branded
Syndrome:
The victim may feel that everyone around him/her can tell
that they have been abused. In cases of male victims, the
abuse itself is not nearly as bad as the fear of other people
finding out about the abuse.
Anger:
Anger is a common feeling that develops after an attack.
Anger is a healthy and common reaction for a survivor, as
long as the anger is not aimed at themselves. Anger can
be a helpful tool for regaining the strength and the courage
needed to get back control of their life.
Physical
symptoms:
Aside from the symptoms associated with the abuse itself,
some other physical symptoms will develop that are directly
caused by the emotional stress. Some common physical symptoms
are: muscle tension, headaches, stomach pains, nausea, appetite
loss, sleep disturbances, fatigue, and nervousness.
